Confusing Thoughts and Childhood Horrors.

New developments are happening. Actually, probably not-and I don't entirely know if I want them too, but I kind of do and it's all just a big ball of confusion, to be quite honest. I don't understand myself about it at all.

When I was little, my sister used to play loads of tricks on me. She told me my mam was a troll. You know, like one of those mad ones with the standing up hair? And she told me she only came out at night, and I used to be terrified. She told me she had put spiders in my bed, and she told me when I fell asleep, she'd carry me out to the chicken house and leave me there. She told me that there was monsters under my bed; I still hate walking across the room in the dark. I've perfected this sort of ninja move, when I'm about a foot or two away from the bed, I jump and I land in the middle of my bed all crouched over. I couldn't do it if it wasn't dark. It's fear, you see. Adrenaline and all that.

I was a pretty scaredy cat child as a result, though only at night. Not during the day, heavens no. You can't be scared after yourself and your childhood friends climb into Blackberry Forest to collect blackberries (I don't even eat them) and one of the boys points out the cow staring at us in the same field (Blackberry forest was a field that consisted of about 3 trees and a blackberry bush) was actually a bull. I could also run a lot faster back in those days.

Now, I'm still a bit scared when it comes to certain things. Such as, the tap that magically turned itself on today. And the weird noises outside at night.

But, the stuff I was scared off back then is so juvenile now. I had a vast imagination back then, so I could pretty much conjure up demons from the shadows. But now I still have a vast imagination, but it's not demons I conjure up. It's reality.