Online Vs Real Life.

Today has been a bit of a waste of a day. It's largely consisted of eating, watching Merlin (Not that that is a waste!) and watching my mother act like we're all going to die slow, horrible deaths due to the Budget.

I could have spent today writing, or studying, or doing something productive that is expected of a Leaving Cert student. But no, I sat on my arse and twiddled my thumbs.

Sometimes I wonder if my persona on the Internet- being the mad Twitter addict that I am- is totally opposite to my real life persona. Like not just with the occasional mystery person I tweet (You guys make me feel popular) but with people I actually know.

Of course, being as paranoid as I am, I then start frantically wondering; what if I'm a disappointment in person? Like, I'm not very well versed in tact, and I tend to be blunt and to the point about things. I'd like to think it was a good trait to have; a bit of honesty, but obviously that wouldn't satisfy everyone.

Not to mention I love a good argument. Not real "You're tacky and I hate you" arguments, more little mess fights. Over silly things, and both parties know it's not serious. I don't think I always manage to get that across though.

I'll stop blabbering on now.

Over and out,
Ri. x

Sick Of The Same Old - Same Old.

I hung out with Robert today. He's probably one of my closest friends really, despite the extremity of our ups and downs with each other. I tell him most things, stuff I wouldn't say to anyone really. We've a lot of history together, four years worth now. My first ever boyfriend, haa.

We had a big talk before I left. I was concerned because I thought he was getting hurt by this girl... Who might I add, is the sweetest girl ever. So lovely. But I was worried anyway. I do that, worry too much.

And when we were talking about it, we started talking about we wanted. We want the same thing actually, but he kinda made me realise I wanted it.

I (and well, him also) want to meet someone completely new. Like a fresh slate. Someone you have no memories with, someone who doesn't know your friends, just someone new. To build memories and get to know without all the "I remember when they did such-and-such" babble, and the stories concerned friends can dig up and such. I'm sick of the whole rinse and repeat attitude in this town. The going out with the same people and kissing the same people and fancying the same people. We may as well all be going around in circles.

I don't want that. I want newness.

I'm gonna be a long time waiting.

And You're Telling Me I Should Forget You...

I had a dream last night, involving my ex. We broke up 10 months ago.

In the dream we got back together, and I was happy. Then he dumped me for a girl I know, who I have no problem with in real life, but who I despised in this dream as she gloated in my face about having him.

It's not a big issue, and it's not the first dream I've had about him since the break up.

But it got me thinking; Do we ever really forget about someone we were that close with? Someone that we shared that much with?